Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
