dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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