after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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