im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
