SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
