im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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