Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
How's work?
Spinning.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
