you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
