This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
That's when you crack a 10am beer
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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