I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
