So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
