There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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