thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
its not stalking. its research.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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