I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
