that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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