Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Randomize
