Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
