You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
That accounts for only three of the penises
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
