where am i from again
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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