Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
