i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
