But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
