I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
