You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
