Plan B is the new Plan A
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
