Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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