I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
now i know why i became what i already was.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
