yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Randomize