i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
