only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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