He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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