I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
