I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
