How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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