I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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