I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
