You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
