I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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