went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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