Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
