ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize