So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
