I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
This house was built for laser tag.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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