bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
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