Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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