My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
