you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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