u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Randomize
