Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
