He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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