one might say we're banned from that church
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
